Common mistakes teens make when stressed about school

Key Takeaways

Audience Spotlight: Supporting Struggling Learners through School Stress

If your teen is finding it hard to manage school demands, you are not alone. Many parents of struggling learners notice that academic worries quickly lead to bigger challenges at home and in the classroom. Teens who face learning differences, attention issues, or simply lack confidence can be especially vulnerable to school-related stress. It is important to remember that these struggles are not a sign of weakness or failure. Instead, they are a normal part of growing up—and with your support, your child can develop the skills needed to overcome them.

Definitions

Academic anxiety is the feeling of worry or fear related to schoolwork, grades, or performance on tests. High school academic stress refers to the pressure students feel to keep up with coursework, extracurriculars, and future plans.

Understanding Common Mistakes Teens Make When Stressed

Stress is a normal response to academic challenges, but the common mistakes teens make when stressed can turn manageable problems into overwhelming ones. In the first moments of high school academic stress, teens may react by avoiding their work, shutting down emotionally, or even becoming irritable with family. These habits are not character flaws—they are ways of coping that may have worked in the past, but often create new hurdles in high school.

Experts in child development note that teens’ brains are still learning how to handle complex emotions and solve problems under pressure. Many teachers and parents report that their students become less organized, more distracted, or overly self-critical just when they need support the most. By understanding these patterns, you can help your child break the cycle of stress and make school feel more manageable.

Confidence Building and Overcoming Academic Anxiety

Confidence plays a key role in how teens respond to stress. When your child believes in their ability to handle challenges, they are less likely to fall into the trap of the common mistakes teens make when stressed. Academic anxiety can chip away at self-esteem, making ordinary assignments or tests seem impossible. This is especially true for struggling learners who may have experienced setbacks before.

Building confidence starts with small wins. Encourage your teen to set achievable goals, celebrate effort over perfection, and reflect on times when they overcame difficulties in the past. Remind them that mistakes are learning opportunities, not signs of failure. If your child tends to catastrophize—imagining the worst possible outcome—help them break tasks into smaller steps and focus on what they can control right now.

Grade 9-12 Guide: Overcoming Academic Anxiety at Home and School

High school brings new academic pressures, social dynamics, and expectations for independence. For struggling learners, these changes can feel overwhelming. The common mistakes teens make when stressed often surface during busy weeks, around major assessments, or when grades begin to slip. Here are some practical ways to help your high schooler navigate these challenges:

• Spot avoidance early: Watch for signs your teen is putting off assignments, skipping classes, or making excuses. Gently ask what feels hard about the task and brainstorm manageable next steps.
• Discourage “all-or-nothing” thinking: Teens under pressure may believe one bad grade ruins everything. Remind your child that progress is built from small steps and that improvement is always possible.
• Normalize asking for help: Remind your child that seeking support from teachers, tutors, or family is a strength, not a weakness. Model this at home by talking openly about times when you needed help.
• Limit unproductive coping: Stress can lead teens to withdraw, procrastinate, or spend extra hours on screens. Help your child notice these patterns and replace them with healthier options, like short breaks, exercise, or connecting with friends.
• Connect to resources: If your child struggles with time management or organization, explore organizational skills tools together. Encourage the use of planners, checklists, or apps to keep track of assignments and deadlines.

What Are the Most Common Mistakes Teens Make When Stressed?

Many parents wonder what the most frequent pitfalls are for teens under academic stress. Here are six of the most common mistakes teens make when stressed about school, with ideas for how parents can gently redirect these habits:

1. Procrastination: Putting off work can provide temporary relief, but it increases anxiety as deadlines approach. Encourage your child to break big tasks into smaller pieces and start with the easiest part first.
2. Perfectionism: Teens may feel their work must be flawless, which can lead to avoidance or burnout. Remind your child that effort and growth matter more than perfection.
3. Withdrawal: Some teens stop communicating or disengage from family and friends. Keep the lines of communication open and offer support without pressure.
4. Negative self-talk: Stress can trigger harsh inner criticism. Help your child reframe negative thoughts by focusing on strengths and past successes.
5. Overcommitting: In an attempt to please others or pad college applications, some teens take on too much. Help your child prioritize their time and set healthy boundaries.
6. Avoiding help: Many teens worry that asking for help means they are not smart enough. Reassure your child that everyone needs support and that reaching out is a sign of maturity.

Recognizing these common mistakes teens make when stressed gives you a roadmap for supportive conversations at home. Remember, change takes time—and each small step counts.

How Can Parents Help Teens Break the Cycle of Academic Stress?

When your child is caught in the cycle of high school academic stress, it is natural to want to step in and fix things. Yet, the most effective support often comes from coaching your child to develop their own coping strategies. Here are some ways to help:

• Model calm problem-solving: When you show how you manage stress, your teen learns by example. Talk through your thought process out loud, and let your child see you take breaks when needed.
• Encourage self-advocacy: Help your child practice speaking up for their needs at school. Role-play conversations with teachers or counselors, and remind your child that self-advocacy is a skill that improves with practice.
• Focus on routines: Consistent sleep, meals, and study times can help teens feel more in control. Work together to build a daily routine that supports healthy habits.
• Celebrate effort: Praise your child for trying new strategies, even if results are not immediate. Highlighting progress builds confidence and reduces the power of academic anxiety.

If you are looking for more ways to help your teen build resilience and confidence, explore our confidence building resources.

Tutoring Support

Sometimes, even the most supportive families need extra help. K12 Tutoring partners with parents and students to tackle the common mistakes teens make when stressed and build lasting academic skills. Whether your child needs support with study habits, organization, or confidence, our experienced tutors are here to help your teen rediscover their love of learning—one step at a time.

Related Resources

• 5 Tips to Help High-Schoolers Cope with Test Anxiety
• 9 Tips for Helping Grade-Schoolers Cope with Test Anxiety
• School Anxiety and Refusal | Well At School – Young Minds

Trust & Transparency Statement

Last reviewed: October 2025
This article was prepared by the K12 Tutoring education team, dedicated to helping students succeed with personalized learning support and expert guidance. K12 Tutoring content is reviewed periodically by education specialists to reflect current best practices and family feedback. Have ideas or success stories to share? Email us at [email protected].