Mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners

Key Takeaways

Audience Spotlight: Supporting Struggling Learners with Goal Setting

Many parents wonder how to set helpful and motivating goals for their children who find school challenging. Struggling learners often face extra hurdles when it comes to focus, confidence, or keeping up with peers. If you are feeling unsure about how to guide your child, you are not alone. This article addresses the mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners, offering practical advice and reassurance for families supporting elementary school students. With thoughtful goal setting and a positive approach, your child can develop skills, independence, and confidence on their learning journey.

Definitions

SMART goals are goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. These steps help children understand exactly what is expected and make progress clear.

Struggling learners refers to students who find learning more difficult than their peers. This can include challenges with reading, math, focus, or organization, or students who simply need extra support to succeed.

Mistakes to Avoid When Setting Goals with Struggling Learners

When you want to help your child succeed, it is natural to set goals together. However, there are several mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners, especially for elementary school students. Recognizing these pitfalls can help you and your child build positive habits and confidence, rather than frustration and self-doubt. Below, we explore common missteps and ways to steer clear of them.

1. Setting Vague or Overly Broad Goals

One of the top mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners is creating goals that are too general. For example, a goal like “Do better at reading” or “Pay more attention in class” is hard for young children to understand and measure. Experts in child development note that children thrive when expectations are clear and specific. Instead, help your child define a concrete goal, such as “Read one new book each week” or “Raise my hand to ask for help once each day.”

2. Aiming Too High (or Too Low) for Your Child’s Current Abilities

Sometimes, in the hopes of encouraging progress, parents might set goals that are out of reach. This can lead to disappointment and lower self-esteem if the goal is not met. On the other hand, setting a goal that is too easy may not encourage growth. Many teachers and parents report that gradual, step-by-step progress works best for struggling learners. Start with small, achievable steps that allow your child to succeed and build momentum. For example, if your child struggles with math facts, begin with mastering addition up to ten before moving on to higher numbers.

3. Ignoring Your Child’s Input and Feelings

When setting goals, it is important to listen to your child’s thoughts and emotions. Children are more likely to stay motivated if they feel heard and involved. One of the key mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners is making goals for them rather than with them. Ask questions such as, “What feels hard for you right now?” or “What is something you would like to get better at?” Work together to find a goal that feels meaningful to your child.

4. Overlooking the Importance of Small Wins

Struggling learners often experience setbacks. Celebrating small steps forward keeps motivation high. If progress is not recognized, children can lose hope or give up. Make a point of noticing and celebrating each improvement, no matter how small. For instance, praise your child for completing homework without reminders, or for staying focused for five extra minutes. These moments build your child’s belief in their ability to succeed.

5. Forgetting to Adjust Goals When Needed

Flexibility is key when supporting struggling learners. Life changes, and so do your child’s needs and strengths. One of the common mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners is sticking to a goal that is no longer helpful or realistic. Check in regularly and adjust goals as needed. It is perfectly fine to change course if something is not working.

6. Not Providing the Right Support and Tools

Even the best-set goals are difficult to achieve without the right help. Make sure your child has the resources and support they need. This might mean working with a teacher, using visual reminders, or creating a quiet study space at home. For more ideas, explore our study habits resources for struggling learners. Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength and growth.

SMART Goals for Students: How This Approach Helps in Elementary School

SMART goals offer a proven framework for success, especially for young learners. Here is how using SMART goals can support your elementary school child:

• Specific: Instead of “Be better at math,” try “Practice multiplication flashcards for 10 minutes every day.”
• Measurable: Your child can track progress and know when the goal is met.
• Achievable: Goals are broken down into steps your child can realistically complete.
• Relevant: The goal connects to something that matters to your child’s learning.
• Time-bound: Set a time frame, such as “by the end of the month.”

Using SMART goals gives struggling learners structure and clarity, making success feel possible. Avoiding mistakes when setting goals means using this framework to keep your child’s experience positive and forward-looking.

Grade Band Focus: Goal Setting Strategies for Elementary School

Elementary school is a key time to build goal-setting habits. Here are some grade-specific tips:

• K-2: Keep goals short and simple, like “Finish my reading log each week.” Use stickers or charts for visual encouragement.
• 3-5: Involve your child in goal planning. Help them reflect on what works and what does not. Practice writing and checking off small steps toward a bigger goal.

For all ages, focus on building confidence and a sense of accomplishment. Remember that what works for one child may not work for another, and it is okay to try different approaches until you find the right fit.

Parent Question: What If My Child Becomes Frustrated or Overwhelmed?

It is common for struggling learners to feel frustrated or discouraged, especially if progress is slow. If you notice your child becoming upset, pause and talk about their feelings. Reassure them that everyone learns at their own pace. Remember, the mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners include pushing too hard and ignoring your child’s emotional needs. Sometimes, taking a break or revisiting the goal together is the most supportive step you can take.

How to Keep Goal Setting Positive and Productive

• Break big goals into smaller, manageable steps.
• Check in regularly and adjust as needed.
• Celebrate progress—even if it is not perfect.
• Partner with teachers and use school resources.

By focusing on your child’s strengths and using a patient, collaborative approach, you will help them develop resilience and independence. Remember, learning to set and reach goals is a skill in itself—and it is one that will serve your child for years to come.

Related Resources

• 5 Tips for Setting SMART Goals as a Family – Waterford.org
• How to Guide Students to Set Academic Goals With Self-Regulated Learning – Edutopia
• Identifying Goals – Overcoming Obstacles

Tutoring Support

If you are looking for extra guidance on the mistakes to avoid when setting goals with struggling learners, K12 Tutoring is here to help. Our experienced tutors work alongside families to create personalized, achievable goals and provide the support your child needs to thrive. Whether your child is building skills, confidence, or just needs someone to cheer them on, we are your trusted partner in learning.

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Last reviewed: October 2025
This article was prepared by the K12 Tutoring education team, dedicated to helping students succeed with personalized learning support and expert guidance. K12 Tutoring content is reviewed periodically by education specialists to reflect current best practices and family feedback. Have ideas or success stories to share? Email us at [email protected].